Tag Archives: Stop Disparaging Yourself

The Illusion of Resentment — Am I Lying to Myself?

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One of the most disparaging things we can do to ourselves is to hang onto and nurture resentments. Resentments give the illusion of control and power. That some how being resentful, angry and bitter is going to help, save or even protect us. But the illusion of resentment in reality serves to distracts us from realizing that resentment, anger and bitterness only serve to eat away at us like a cancer, stealing life; like a thief in the night,.

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.” Carrie Fisher

“Bitterness and resentment only hurt one person, and it’s not the person we’re resenting – it’s us.” Alana Stewart

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of harming another; you end up getting burned.” Author unknown

Although wounds may be minimized and even disregarded, like an infection that goes untreated, will lead to further complications. Resentments effectively work to  block emotional, spiritual and physical energy. Resentment serves to distract. Resentment,  in their wake; bring about destruction. Resentments, like lava; smolder beneath the surface; oozing out at unpredictable and unexpected times adversely — impacting lives and relationships.

But there is good news. I have found that resentments can be checked and resolved through a process. The process involves being honest with myself, taking the time to examine who I am resentful at, the cause of my resentment, how the resentment impacts my — self-esteem, personal relationships, finances, material goods, security, ambitions and my emotional well-being — and what part my motives played in the formation of my resentments.

Examining and resolving my resentments empower my ability to forgive both myself and other people. Examining and resolving resentments help me to stop fighting against myself. Examining and resolving resentments help me to stop lying to myself.  Examining and resolving resentments free the internal energy that I used to lie to  myself. Examining and resolving resentments empower my ability to take effective action to  create hope in my life.

“Unless commitment is made, there are only promises and hopes… but no plans.” Peter Drucker

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